The best damn turkey you ever did taste (you never fail me, Alton Brown)

Materials:

• 1 (14-16 lb.) turkey
• 1 (5-gallon) bucket

Brine:

• 1 c. kosher salt
• 1/2 c. light brown sugar
• 1 gallon vegetable stock
• 1 Tbsp. black peppercorns
• 1-1/2 tsp. allspice berries
• 1-1/2 tsp. chopped candied giner
• 1 gallon heavily iced water

Aromatics:

• 1 red apple, sliced (can also add another green for bigger bird)
• 1/2 onion, sliced
• 1 cinnamon stick
• 1 c. water
• 4 sprigs rosemary
• 6 leaves sage
• Canola

Methods:

2-3 days before roasting:

1. Begin thawing turkey in the refrigerator or in a cooler kept at 38F.
2. Combine the vegetable stock, salt, brown sugar, peppercorns, allspice berries, and candied ginger in a large stockpot over medium-high heat. Stir occasionally to dissolve solids and bring to a boil. Then remove the brine from the heat, cool to room temperature, an refrigerate.

Night before you'd like to eat:

1. Combine the brine, water and ice in the 5-gallon bucket. Place the thawed turkey (with innards removed - save for stuffing!) breast side down in brine. If necessary, weigh down the bird to ensure it is fully immersed, cover, and refrigerate or set in cool area for 8 to 16 hours, turning the bird once halfway through brining. 

Turkey day:

1. Preheat the oven to 500F. Remove the bird from the brine and rinse inside and out with cold water. Discard the brine. 
2. Place the bird on roasting rack inside a half sheet pan and pat dry with paper towels. 
3. Combine the apple, onion, cinnamon stick, and 1 cup water in a microwave safe dish and microwave on high for 5 minutes. Add steeped aromatics to the turkey's cavity along wih the rosemary and sage. Tuck the wings underneath the bird and coat the skin liberally with canola oil.
4. Roast the turkey on lowest level of the oven at 500F for 30 minutes. Remove tukey and make breast-plate for bird out of tin foil. Insert a probe thermometer into the thickest part of the breast and reduce the oven temperature to 350F. Set the thermometer alarm to 161F. A 14-16 lb. bird should require a total of 2-2.5 hours of roasting. Let the turkey rest, loosely covered with foil or a large mixing bowl for 15 minutes before carving.